I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
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