I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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