I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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