That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
high people should be assigned attendants
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
