16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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