My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
