Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
