Plan B is the new Plan A
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
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