whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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