im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize
