This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize
