whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
