oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
