I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
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