Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
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