yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
third nipple confirmed
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize