She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize
