guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Randomize
