I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
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