i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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