"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
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