If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
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