Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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