...so i touched it.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
Randomize