Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(647): View more from Ontario

Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.

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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(440): View more from Ohio

Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now

(440): View more from Ohio

Ps I am

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS

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(256): View more from Alabama

Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive

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(651): View more from Minnesota

I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.

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(512): View more from Texas

My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"

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