Barsexuality is the new black.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
