How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Randomize