I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
We are two peas in an std pod
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
