ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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