In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
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