butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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