The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I just forgot I was standing up.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
