Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Randomize
