So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Randomize
