so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Mom said you looked used
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
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