Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
