Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Randomize
