We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
