my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
