I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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