I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
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i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
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I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled