So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Randomize
