she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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