11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
I think people are normalizing furries
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize