Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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