once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
