I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
I can't turn off my feet"
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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