So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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