I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
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