I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
Randomize