I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
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Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
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Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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